Connecting or Communicating?

I’ve been trying to post this for two days, and I just realized that’s a good thing.  I had originally entitled it, “Why, How and What” but fortunately changed the subject.  Had I gotten it done yesterday, I would not have read Darren Hardy’s article about the May issue of Success Magazine before I sent it.  The article is entitled, “Are You Connecting or Just Communicating?” and in it, he says that with his blog, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, emails and text messages and a database of 10,000 contacts, he has been mistaking communication for connection.  He said that he is “a mile wide and an inch deep”.

I’ve been guilty of the same thing – saying a lot, but connecting with very few people.  The Year of Living Dangerously (1982), with Mel Gibson and Sigourney Weaver, is one of my all time favorite movies.  I mention that because I just spent the last year living not dangerously, but with a “why” focused on a noble goal that no one knew and leaving people wondering, “Where’s Rich” half the time.  It was probably more important to share that why in hopes that it would connect with your life and help to make it better than to struggle on and keep it to myself.  All of us, from members to coaches, should open up and share our why, what drives us, and by so doing, help other people reach their goals with a shared “How” and the “What” that we have achieved with our persistence and determination.

Do you have a “why” that is your driving force in life?  Do you need to lose weight for health reasons or to simply feel better about yourself?  Do you need to get in better shape to be able to do more things and have better quality of life?  Do you want more energy to get through the day and keep up with your kids at night?  Do you want to overcome depression and start seeing the bright side of life again?  Do you need to make more money to make ends meet?  Do you need to find a way to spend more time with your family?  Having a strong “why” is the goal that you work toward every day without wavering and never giving up.  My “why” now is to give my girls the best life that they can have and that goal consumes virtually all of my time day and night.

How am I achieving my “why”? It may sound counter intuitive, but I am working on me first by working out religiously, eating better, gaining weight and trying to get more sleep.  That in turn has raised my confidence and self esteem by leaps and bounds.  My focus before left me little time and energy to work out and eat right and I lost weight that I could ill afford to lose.  In addition, I kept getting sick and that made it significantly less likely that I would achieve my goals.  I decided with my new “why” to do the full 90 days of P90X.  I learned from running out of Shakeology that home direct was the only way to go.  I made time to cook nutritiously for myself and not just think about what Grace and Carly were eating with nothing planned for myself.  With my new “why”, I started sleeping better and that also helped immensely.

What are the results of my efforts?  I am way stronger after 3 weeks of P90X, I look less like Abe Lincoln, I have gained 3 pounds and I don’t wake up dead tired every morning.  Both girls got sick again (they’ve had it really rough, too) and so did I, but this time, the Shakeology got me through with more energy than I have had in a long time even though when I cough it sounds like I’ve been a 3 pack a day smoker for 20 years.  My outlook on life has improved and the future now burns brightly when before it seemed like a candle in the wind.  Because I am a Team Beachbody coach, I am now able to work more productively, lead more effectively and my prosperity has increased substantially.

Why am I sharing all of this with you?  Because I don’t just want to communicate, I want to connect and I want all of you to connect with your family, friends, neighbors and coworkers.  Maybe they are going through hardships, too, and their struggles are overwhelming them.  By sharing our “why, how and what”, we can show them that there is a way, a truth and a life that will lead them to the promised land of health and fitness.  We are all responsible for each other these days, so let’s all connect and change people’s lives.

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